I’ve always been ambitious when it comes to my career. But life hasn’t followed a straight line.
Back in 2008, I lost my job during the recession and became a full-time childminder while raising my two boys. I stayed out of the workplace until 2016 and, when I returned, I was chomping at the bit to catch up. People I once taught were now senior managers, and for a long time I felt like I’d failed.
Fast forward to 2025: I’m on my fifth job, third promotion, and finally in a role I love. Yet imposter syndrome still creeps in. And if I’m honest, I’m always looking for that “next step.”
The Missed Promotion
Recently, I was encouraged to go for a big promotion. It felt perfect — almost written for me. I poured my heart into preparing, researching, and shaping my application. I dared to picture myself as “future CEO material.”
But I didn’t get the role. In fact, I didn’t even make it past the first interview.
It floored me. My confidence took a huge knock. I still believe I have more to give, more difference to make, but suddenly my current role felt… not enough.
A Forced Pause
Not long after the news, I had minor surgery and was signed off work for a few weeks. At first, the timing felt cruel — but in truth, it gave me perspective.
I realised my health must come first, my family second. Everything else is gravy.
For years I’ve believed I had to prove my worth by constantly delivering, speaking up, being the one to push for change. But maybe it’s okay to step back sometimes. To focus on what I can achieve here and now, within my own wheelhouse, without always standing above the parapet.
Finding a New Balance
I won’t lie — I feel deflated. Like my fire’s gone out a little. But that’s okay. Sometimes we need to sit with the stillness before we find our spark again.
Work matters — it’s a huge part of our lives. But it doesn’t define us. I know I’ll find my way forward, but I’m learning to take it one step at a time.
Maybe not getting what we thought we wanted is simply a redirection — a reminder that we’re already enough, even without the fancy job title.
💬 Have you ever felt stuck in a rut like this? Like you were meant for bigger things? I’d love to hear your story.
You may also like to read my posts on The Next Chapter and Finding Joy in Organisation
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